Hello everyone!
I'm here to spread the humour.
Here are a few funny stories:

1. (26 May 2004, Wolfsberg, Austria) The manager of an apartment house was surprised to find the legs of a corpse sticking out an apartment window. Police entered the apartment and found the deceased man's head soaking in a sink full of hot water.

Apparently the out-of-work Austrian had returned home after a night of drinking and drugs. He decided to slip in through the kitchen window. The window was fixed at the base and tilted out, giving him just enough room to squeeze his head through as far as the sink before he got stuck. While flailing around trying to escape, he turned on the hot water tap.

Police were not sure why he had not turned off the water, pulled the plug, or--perhaps most important--entered through the front door, since they found the keys in his pants pocket.

2. (2 February 2008, Bulgaria) It was a cold but sunny February afternoon. Lidia, a biology teacher from Sofia, was driving two friends home from a memorial service. Suddenly the vehicle stopped. Bystanders saw all three occupants dash from the car to a nearby manhole and start pouring down liquids and powders from various bottles and jars.

Apparently the biology teacher had been performing chemistry experiments in her free time, and had some leftover noxious chemicals. It is still not entirely clear what the chemicals were, but two of the bottles were labeled diethyl ether and methanol, both highly flammable liquids. The former is also used as a sedative, so one explanation for their actions is that they felt dizzy from the ether vapors and thought it was a good idea to pour them in the sewer.

As it turns out, a good idea it definitely was not. The cocktail of flammable substances in the enclosed space of the sewer caused an explosion so powerful that it launched the manhole cover into the air, decapitating the (briefly) surprised Lidia. Left without a head on her shoulders, she decided it was time to kick the bucket.

The other two people were not unharmed, but were alive. They were taken to the hospital with burns on their faces. They may not regain their eyesight, but hopefully will be able to speak clearly enough to tell their children that tossing random chemicals down the drain is not as wise as it might at first appear.

3. (7 March 2005, Vietnam) Nguyen, 21, had been drinking with friends in Hanoi, when he pulled out an old detonator he had found. It was about six centimeters long and eight centimeters in diameter, with two wires hanging out. Because it was old and rusty, Nguyen said, it couldn't explode. His friends disagreed.

To prove his point, Nguyen put the detonator in his mouth and asked his friend to plug the dangling wires into a 220-volt electrical receptacle.

Turns out Nyugen was wrong!

The victim had little time to reflect on his mistaken, or whether 220 volts alone could have been fatal. According to police, "the explosion blew out his cheeks and smashed all his teeth." He died on the way to the hospital.

Here are some dumb blonde jokes:

One blonde can make a difference! At least that is what the blonde in this joke thought.

She was tired of everyone thinking that blondes were stupid, and she didn't like all these jokes. To end the injustice, she decided to prove to the world that she was smart.

In order to prove herself, she chose to memorize the capital of every American state. It wasn't an easy task, but she was determined and eventually managed to do it.

A few days later she was in a bar, and heard a couple of men laughing at a blonde joke. This was the perfect opportunity to start righting all the wrongs that had been done to blondes in the past - she would set these men straight!

Marching over at a rapid pace she announced,
"It isn't true that all blondes are stupid, and I will prove it. Just ask me the capital of any American state, and I will tell you what it is."

Although a little surprised, the men did challenge her and asked,
"Ok, how about Arizona?"

The Blonde, after pausing for a moments thought, proudly gave the answer,
"A"!

A blonde and a redhead went to the bar after work for a drink, and sat on stools watching the 6 O'clock news. A man was shown threatening to jump from the Brooklyn Bridge, and the blonde bet the redhead $50 that he wouldn't jump.

Sure enough, he jumped, so the blonde gave the redhead $50. The redhead said,

"I can't take this, you're my friend."

But the blonde insisted saying,

"No. A bet's a bet."

Then the redhead said

"Listen, I have to tell you that I saw this on the 5 O'clock news, so I can't take your money."

The blonde replied

"Well, so did I, but I didn't think he would jump again!"

A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to have her hair she would look like a brunette.

When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country.

After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep and thought,

"Oh! Those sheep are so adorable!"

She got out and walked over to the farmer and said,

"If I can guess how many sheep you have, can I take one home?"

The farmer, being a bit of a gambler himself, said she could have a try.

The blonde looked at the flock and guessed, "157."

The farmer was amazed - she was right! So the blonde, (who looked like a brunette), picked one out and got back into her car.

Before she left, farmer walked up to her and said.

"If I can guess the real color of your hair, can I have my dog back?"

You Are a Caramel Crunch Donut

You're a complex creature, and you're guilty of complicating things for fun. You've been known to sit around pondering the meaning of life... Or at times, pondering the meaning of your doughnut. To frost or not to frost? To fill or not to fill? These are your eternal questions.

What Donut Are You?

47 more days until I change my blogskin!

I just did a very stupid thing.
I finished an online quiz in 5 mins 07 seconds, but then silly me went and pressed the back button so the timing registered as 6 mins 57 seconds!!!
I serioously feel like slapping myself.
_____________________________________________________________

I didn't eat lunch AND dinner today.
Now my body is experiencing the consequences.

Anyway, I am very happy today.
The first reason is because I feel that our squad's physical standard has improved a lot from the last training.
1. More people cheered.
2. Cheering was loud and consistant.
3. We encouraged our squadmates who were falling behind.
4. Mdm Qing Yi praised us! Yay!

I think 1 of the major problems we have to improve on is dragging our feet.
I believe that none of us want to crawl and look unglam in front of our std 1s.
We want them to look at us and say," Hey! I want to be just like the std 2s."
Oh yes, and don't fidget in squad as well.
By standing straight, we can look 1-2cm taller and, as Mdm Qing Yi said, the std 1s can literally look up to us. :)

Cooperation
Initiative
Efficiency
Team spirit
Self-discipline
CIETS!

If we practise these 5 qualities, we will be the BEST std 2 squad that we can be and our instructors will be proud of us.

I also kenna sabo-ed by Sgt Liwen to be the I/C of my batch.
At first we all pointed at her, but then she said must let a std 2 be I/C.
Then she sabo-ed me just because I was sitting right in front of her.
Lol!

Even though I wanted to be in logistics, I understand that activities committee needs more manpower and who knows?
It might be fun. :)

The second reason I am happy today is that I finally convinced my mother to let me quit swimming!
Hooray! :D

You Are Excited

You are vibrant and lively. You bring passion to everything that you do. You are very animated and energetic. People find you dazzling and charming. Beyond being happy, you are optimistic and enthusiastic. There's so much life to live, and you're eager to experience so much!